Of friends and farts

Today I had lunch with 3 anonymous friends. As we were waiting for the lift, person A touched a pole that we believed was contaminated with VRE. As the discussion went on, the topic turned to farts and person A (who by now desperately wanted to sterilise his/her hand and refused to contaminate any belongings of his/hers) asked casually :" When you fart, isn't there water coming out?"

Everyone was shocked. Thus, I shall post some definitions about farts in the joke corner. However, the list does not include wet farts so the affected person should seek help elsewhere.

Jokes:

The Vain Person -- One who loves the smell of his own farts.
The Amiable Person -- One who loves the smell of other people's farts.
The Proud Person -- One who thinks his farts are exceptionably fine.
The Shy Person -- One who releases silent farts then blushes.
The Imprudent Person -- One who boldly farts out loud, and then laughs.
The Unfortunate PersonOne who tries hard to fart, but shits instead.
The Scientific Person -- One who farts frequently, but is truly concerned for the environment.
The Nervous Person -- One who stops in the middle of a fart.
The Honest Person -- One who admitted he farted, but offers a good medical reason.
The Dishonest Person -- One who farts but blames the dog.
The Foolish Person -- One who suppresses a fart for hours and hours.
The Thrifty Person -- One who always has several farts in reserve.
The Anti-Social Person -- One who excuses himself and farts in complete privacy.
The Strategic Person -- One who conceals his farts with loud coughing.
The Sadistic Person -- One who farts in bed and then fluffs the covers over his bedmate.
The Intelligent Person -- One who can determine from the smell of his neighbor's fart, precisely the latest food items consumed.